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Sex & relationships
‘No matter what we’ve been through I’ve never lost hope’
Colleen Haynes Sheehy married a man with a disability, against her family’s advice. Sadly he passed away, but she went on to marry another man with the same disease
GREAT SEXPECTATIONS: What’s the problem with sex before marriage?
In our fortnightly column “Great Sexpectations” the Woman Alive panel answer your questions on sex, faith and intimacy. Drop us a confidential email on womanalive@premier.org.uk and ask us anything. Here, we tackle; What’s the problem with sex before marriage?
Nothing breaks like a heart but no one heals like our God… dealing with heartbreak as a Christian
Heartbreak can be excruciating, but as Christians we have God, who soothes and comforts. Here author of Notes On Love, Lauren Windle, shares some things that may help you if you’re trying to mend a broken heart.
I’m a marriage counsellor but the best marriage advice I’ve been given was hard to swallow
Alongside her husband, Claire Musters offers pre-marital classes to engaged couples and marriage ‘check-ups’ to those in their local church, and together they have also written a book on marriage. However, Claire says the best piece of marriage advice she was given was something it took her years to accept.
We expect married couples to go from zero to hero in the bedroom after their wedding, but I found out it’s not that simple
Writer Shakira Peronet confessed that before she got married, she was clueless about sex. Here she explains the three things that helped her navigate her newly-wed sex life.
Christian dating in my 50s was nothing like I remember from my 20s… the idea that my love life is determined by ‘a swipe’ is horrific
Finding a partner is a challenge at any age but Maxine Hallett found dating in her 50s to be a totally different ball game to when she was in her 20s. Here she explains how she ‘got back out there’ and how she found the difficult world of online dating.
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If you’re a Christian and you’re watching Love Island… there are some things you need to know
Tabloid journalist and author of Notes On Love, Lauren Windle explains that, while she can’t tell you whether or not it’s right to watch Love Island, she can tell you some things you’ll need to remember if you do
‘My husband came out as transgender’
In the spring of 2015, Pam Jones’s husband of 24 years wrote her a letter explaining that they wanted to be known as Chrissie. Their rugged alpha male persona had been a mask, an act of performative masculinity to protect their true self, which was, and always had been, intrinsically feminine
Can you still be friends with your ex and are you a bad Christian if you don’t manage it?
As much as we’d prefer it didn’t, dating can get messy so staying friends with an ex can be a challenge. Author of Notes On Love Lauren Windle, explores when you should and shouldn’t pursue friendship with an ex and the best ways to go about it.
I’m a Christian marriage counsellor and these five things are vital to remember for a healthy marriage
Christian marriage counsellor Teresa Weeks of Marriage Care offers couples five simple reminders that will positively impact their relationship. Plus she explains the ‘unspoken messages’ you’re sending with caring behaviour.
Women struggle with pornography too… so why do we only speak to men and boys about it?
While porn use has traditionally been seen as a men’s issue, Naked Truth Project says it is vital to raise awareness of the struggles women face too and remove the shame and stigma that prevents many women from seeking the help and support they need.
Being poor and married is more stable than being rich and cohabiting, study reveals
Research from The Marriage Foundation suggests that co-habiting parents were twice as likely to break up than their married counterparts. Writer Lauren Windle, takes a look at the stats.
Single women are leaving the church because they feel undervalued - and if you’re one of them, do this instead
Many single women feel devalued and excluded from church life as a result of being unmarried. Rather than allowing yourself to feel this way or worse, leaving the church altogether, Dr Katie Gaddini offers three things you can do instead.
If you’re single at the moment but would prefer not to be, this is what you need to know
Plenty of people who are single at the moment are hoping to find a relationship and ultimately marriage. Paula Halliday, author of Singled Out, shares the key things every single person should remember.
It wasn’t until my husband and I separated that we realised we’d been complacent, now we’re stronger than ever
During Marriage Week UK, May 10-16, writer Claire Musters shares how the most painful period in her marriage actually strengthened it.
I’m a Christian actor who was part of the controversial ‘Family Sex Show’ - the play has been slandered and I believe in it more than ever
Keziah Joseph was part of the team who devised and acted in ‘The Family Sex Show’, a play that hit the headlines after stirring up outrage for its sexual content for children and families. Here she explains why she supports the show and is upset by its censorship.
‘God told me you're the one’ and four other red flags that I’ve experienced on dodgy dates
Looking back over her Christian dating disasters, Rachel Pearce identifies five disturbing phrases that are a sure fire sign you need to run for the hills.
Can married women stop ditching their single female friends please?
After marriage a friendship reshuffle is inevitable as you settle into a groove of married life. But writer Lauren Windle argues that married women often navigate this very badly, leaving their single friends feeling left out in the cold.
‘I have never experienced a relationship like this’
Vicki Keir shares her story of failed marriages – including discovering abuse in her home – and the faithful God who has given her hope and joy again
‘Singing has helped me with fear and anxiety’
Singer Elle Limebear talked to Jemimah Wright about being the daughter of Delirious? front man Martin Smith and her own call to the music industry
I’m a relationship therapist and here are four tips on dating while grieving the loss of your partner
Losing your partner is the most difficult experience and continuing with every day life can be daunting. Allowing someone new into your life can feel overwhelming too and possibly impossible to consider, here relationship therapist Charisse Cooke explains what to consider.
Ignore Netflix, issuing a marriage ultimatum in your relationship is never a good idea and here’s why
A new Netflix reality show pushes couples to the brink with the ultimatum: ‘marry me or leave me alone’. Writer Lauren Windle explains why, despite being tempting, this is probably a terrible idea.
Relationships are three times more likely to succeed if you marry compared to informal cohabitation, survey reveals
The latest research from the Marriage Foundation that shows that even those who aren’t Christian are more likely to work on a relationship if they have cemented it in marriage.
These are the dating apps and sites where you can find Christians
If you fancy online dating but want to make sure you maximise your chances of meeting a Christian, this is the list for you. Lauren Windle explains exactly which sites and apps the faith community is using.
I’m a divorced Christian but I’m conflicted about changes to the law; I believe divorce should be hard
The “no-fault” divorce law comes into effect this week and Tola-Doll Fisher, Woman Alive editor and divorcee, is conflicted about what this might mean for couples and their staying power.
I’m a single Christian man and these are the things women do on dating apps that I find difficult
Christian Tim Bechervaise has been doing online dating on and off for years. Here he explains the things he’s experienced women do on the apps which make it far more difficult to date.
You are not broken because you find it difficult to reach orgasm
Many women get frustrated with themselves for not enjoying sex as much as their husbands and for finding it difficult to reach climax. Here The Great Sex Rescue author Sheila Wray Gregoire, explains it’s all about listening to your body and warming up slowly.
A Romeo and Juliet love story
Ram and Sunita Gidoomal are from different castes (class systems), which meant those around them felt their relationship simply couldn’t work. They proved everyone wrong
You are not broken because you don’t feel like having sex with your husband
Feeling guilty that your sex drive isn’t as high as your husband’s? Writer Sheila Wray Gregoire explains that there are often two reasons for a low libido, one is down to you and the other is down to him.
Valentine’s Day shouldn’t be in church - it’s a social and commercial event, not a spiritual one
On the day that is designated to celebrate love, Lauren Windle explains why she is all for Valentine’s Day but thinks it should be kept out of our places of worship.
From meeting to marriage in one month: a testimony of God’s faithfulness
Singer song-writer Kira was full of challenging questions of faith and was eager to meet a husband. She met a man and they were married 30 days later. Here she tells Michele Morrison her story.
Valentine’s Day isn’t a big deal but it took getting married for me to realise
After years of singleness, Jemimah Wright shares about the anticipation of her first valentine’s day as a married woman.
Why there aren’t enough men in your church and what we can all do about it
Author and chartered psychologist Annabel Clarke explains how fewer Christian men can affect individuals, families and the Church.
Let’s fly the flag for ‘old love’…
Veronica Zundel refuses to run after the thrill of the ‘new’, but values hard-won, deepening relationships
‘I was reminded about being single every day at church’
Lauren Windle caught up with Christianity’s poster girl for single women, Carrie Lloyd, to ask how she feels about love, life and relationships ten years on from the start of her ministry
Rescuing our sex lives
Relationships writer Sheila Wray Gregoire busts the myths that so many Christians have about intimacy
Whose job is it to fill my love tank?
In the second part of her mini-series, Candy Ellie explains what can affect our ability to recognise and retain love in a healthy way
Married at 54: ‘I was willing to wait’
TV anchor Wendy Griffith dedicated a book to her future husband when she was still very much single. She explains how she discovered that ultimately, God is the best matchmaker
It’s time to make dating a safer environment for those with disabilities
Dating with a disability comes with its own challenges. Jerusha Mather explains that when it comes to romance, the power to include is in each of our hands.
Infertility is a type of grief that gets worse with time and sadly the Church can be both healing and wounding
Research shows that an infertility diagnosis can cause the same level of physiological stress as that of terminal cancer. Here Rhythm of Hope’s Sarah Lang, offers insight into the pain of trying for a child and encouragement for those losing hope.
Is no sex before marriage out-dated or more important than ever?
Research suggests that the number of unmarried Christians under the age of 35 who are having sex, has risen from 20% in 2008 to nearly 60% in 2021. Author Carrie Lloyd spoke to Woman Alive about abstinence and why we shouldn’t give up on it.
'Golden couple' Meagan Good and DeVon Franklin are splitting - but what about the unhelpful pedestal we put them on?
Many people were rocked by the news that celibacy advocates and Christian celebrity couple Meagan Good and DeVon Franklin are separating. But Tola Doll Fisher asks why it’s so much more appealing for us to follow a highly visible, beautiful, golden couple than the Bible.
Love on a bicycle
Two newly married couples, Dawn and Tim Laundon and Matt and Coco Morley, told Clare Blake what they learned on their life-changing cycling trips
‘Singled Out in a Couple’s World’
Christa Smith spoke to Jemimah Wright about her new book, which aims to break the stigma of singleness
Christmas as a single person is hard… but you’re not on your own
Dreading facing your family festivities without a partner again this year? Don’t worry, we know how you feel.
I’m pleased the extreme abortion amendment failed… again, but Christians need to change how they speak to their MPs
As the ‘Johnson ammendment’ fails to go through for the third time, Christian Medical Fellowship’s Jennie Pollock explains why this is good news, but also why we need to change how we petition our MPs.
Domestic violence is up 6% on last year and it’s time Christians realised that this is happening in our churches
Domestic abuse-related crimes in England and Wales increased by 6% on last year according to the Office of National Statistics figures released last week. Bekah Legg from domestic abuse survivor’s charity Restored UK, explained that the church needs to be more aware of what’s going on behind closed doors.
‘My ex-husband bit off my nose, cut off my ear and carved up my face like a cabbage in an attempt to slit my throat’
Make this International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women (25 November) count, urges Abbie Mumbi
‘As far as I was concerned, affairs were for characters in soaps and films, not Christian marriages!’
Babs Bray felt great compassion for Alice Evans when the news of husband Ioan Gruffudd’s alleged infidelity broke. Despite Babs’s heartbreak after her ex-husband’s affair came to light, she was determined to forgive her ex and do the right thing
5 important reminders about marriage from Hailey and Justin Bieber
Whatever you think of them talking about their marriage on a podcast, Justin and Hailey have shared some important lessons, says Claire Musters
Young people really do want us to talk to them about sex
Rachel Gardner urges us to get over our embarrassment and fear of saying the wrong thing, because we have a vital role in helping to shape young people’s attitudes towards relationships and sex
‘Adoption was our first choice’
On World Adoption Day, Chrissi Pegg shares the story of how she and her husband came to adopt their two daughters
What would you give up for love?
As Japan’s Princess Mako has turned her back on her royal status in order to marry, Ola Awonubi looks at how the desire to be married has impacted Christian women’s lives
Fertility leave may help couples who are struggling to conceive
During National Fertility Awareness Week (1-5 November) we look at how employers are beginning to recognise the need to support those experiencing fertility issues – it is time the Church did the same
‘No one can promise you a husband. No one can even promise you a text back’
Lauren Windle looks at the growing market for love coaches and considers the impact for Christian women
Dating while Black: ‘Anyone who says they don’t have a physical type is either incredibly open-minded or is lying’
An OkCupid survey found that white, Asian and Latino men were 19% less likely to interact with a woman who was black. Tibz Adeniyi told Lauren Windle about her experiences of dating as a black British woman.
‘The pain of miscarriage was probably worse than full-term labour pains’
To mark Baby Loss Awareness Week (9-15 October) Tammy Tunnah shares about her traumatic miscarriage and how mentally agonising her next pregnancy was, and we look at the place of art therapy in processing baby loss
‘Violence against women is a chronic situation that must be rejected’
Hannah Baylor says it is time for ‘women to claim their worth’ and ‘men to challenge and change their own, and other men’s, behaviour’
Sexual soul ties are real - and dangerous
The time of year when singles rush to couple up ahead of winter – known as ‘cuffing’ – is upon us. However, Candy-Ellie Graham warns us that it isn’t worth cuddling up to just anyone
The dos and don’ts of dating, according to four famous Bond girls
With the latest Bond film, No Time to Die, out on 30th September, Rachel Pearce looks to her favourite Bond girls for some hot dating tips… For Your Eyes Only!
Could a Christian go on Married at First Sight?
Lauren Windle questions whether Christian contestants could appear on this controversial reality TV show without compromising their faith
If you are considering a career in porn…don’t
Former topless model Susie Flashman-Jarvis was mortified to discover that one in five Brits would consider a career in pornography. Having seen the devastating effects porn can have, her advice is to stay well away
Support for singles of all ages
Whenever there is provision for singles in churches it is often targeted at young people. Rev Eleanor Jeans is author of a course called Securely Single, which aims to help those of any age live life to the full, whether singleness was something they chose or not. She shared about her own experiences of being single with Premier’s Maria Rodrigues.
We need to talk about sex in church!
When many Christian couples get married they are ill-equipped to navigate sexual intimacy. Premier’s Maria Rodrigues spoke with psychosexual nurse therapist Emma Waring, who longs to see churches talking more openly about the struggles couples face in the bedroom
‘I thought my wife would be better off without me’
Premier’s Maria Rodrigues spoke to Patrick and Diane Regan about the physical and mental health challenges he faced, and how they affected Diane too.
Why ‘Naked Marriage’?
It is UK National Marriage Week (10–16 May). Here, its coordinator, Michaela Hyde, explains the idea behind this year’s theme.
Healing after an affair
During UK National Marriage Week, we’re inviting couples to consider having some tough conversations, whether that be about sex, making a will or handling money well. Steve and Claire Musters spoke to Premier’s Maria Rodrigues about the way forgiveness saved their marriage, as documented in their new book Grace-Filled Marriage.
My final love offering
At the start of Dying Matters Awareness Week, Ann Clifford shares the importance of preparing for death well – and how she made her own preparations this year.
What does the Bible say about sex and relationships?
There is much wrong in what our culture teaches us about attitudes towards sex and relationships, but also many wrong perceptions about what the Bible says about these vital topics. Elaine Storkey unpacks why this is and reveals what it truly says
I'm in love with a non-Christian...
It’s all very well to talk about not being yoked to unbelievers, but what do you do when a non-Christian steals your heart?
Life after a Christian divorce
Steph Gutmann grew up as a pastor's kid and prayed for her marriage to be blessed by God, but when it turned abusive she was challenged about how to make things work. She shared her story with Premier's Maria Rodrigues.
Finding love online
Two couples tell Clare Blake how their love stories began online
A second chance at marriage
?Gilly, 73, was married to Gordon, 64, for 16 years until they divorced. They were apart for another 16 years but here Gilly explains why they remarried in 2019
Married at first sight, can it ever work?
Can a marriage be arranged by relationship experts? Ruth Sax takes a look at a TV show that takes puts two people together who don’t actually meet til their wedding day. Yes, really.
Is divorce okay for Christians?
Dr Zina Arinze is a lawyer, so why did she go into the field of helping those who have been through divorce find healing and restoration? Premier radio presenter Maria Rodrigues spoke with her to find out more about her story
Let's talk about sex
Adrian and Celia Reynolds have written a book about the struggles couples often face with physical intimacy in marriage, exploring why the Bible says about it and the priority sex should take in a marriage. Premier radio presenter Maria Rodrigues spoke with them about it
The Church is failing single people
Lauren Windle, a 30-something Londoner, has spent the last year interviewing people on their dating experiences in Church and has written Notes on Love based on her findings. It is a much-needed upgrade from a long line of handbooks telling people “How to wait patiently for your Boaz” or “You’re single because you’re not ready”. Lauren tells Tola-Doll Fisher she wrote it not as a guide, but as an invitation to explore a relationship status that she says has been sorely blown out of proportion
‘Single people are vital to the future of the Church’
Beth Collingridge from Single Friendly Church says that we need to value and include single people much more
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