God wants us to enjoy mind-blowing, exciting sex, says Bobbi Kumari. And each time a married couple has sex, they are reflecting God’s covenant with his people


God is excited about married people having sex! Seriously? Are we talking about the same God, I hear you ask? Yes! A resounding YES! The God of the Bible celebrates sex!

Not just ordinary, mediocre, run of the mill sex either, but mind-blowing, glorious, blissful beyond belief, exciting sex! Yet somewhere along the line a major glitch in the sexuality matrix has clearly occurred and somehow satan gets all the credit for the pleasurable, super erotic stuff, the heated passion, orgasms and sexual ecstasy; and God, gets lumbered with the missionary position? Errr Hello?! How can this be possible? When it was God who created the orgasm! From the very beginning, sex and pleasure were God’s idea! It was God who created sexual desire! Not satan!

Sex God’s way

It was our incredible Father in heaven who lovingly chose to make arousal of our sexual organs pleasurable beyond measure. To give us countless more super sensitive nerve endings in our erogenous zones, which are completely different to nerve endings we have elsewhere in our human body. God came up with the idea to create body parts with the sole purpose of sexual arousal. 

Seriously, nerve endings with no other function but for pleasure! God did that! Yet because of the fall, our understanding of God as the author and the wonderful designer of sex has so radically been marred, that we have simply no idea how great sex can be when we do it God’s way. His way of enabling us to enjoy sex is truly supreme.

It was God who created the orgasm!

He has prescribed a specific way for us to not only enjoy sexual pleasure, but also to encounter freedom, joy, passion and emotional satisfaction to the highest degree, in an environment of transparency, love and unimaginable intimacy. That sounds pretty incredible, right? This is why anything outside of this divinely ordained context for enjoying sex is in fact sexual disorder: it is a misuse of sex, that will ultimately only lead to emptiness, pain and destruction.

You see, God created sex as a wonderful gift to be thoroughly enjoyed only within the confines of a marriage, between one man and one woman. We know this from reading Genesis 2:24 (AMPC): “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall become united and cleave to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

This verse clearly demonstrates that a husband becomes “one flesh” with his wife within the confines of marriage, where a physical, sexual and spiritual union takes place. This occurs specifically within the God-ordained context of sacred matrimony. The same verse also uses the word “cleave”, from the original term dabaq, which means ‘adhere to,’ denoting marital intimacy.

The definition is used several times in the Bible in varying situations, referring to a ‘sticking to, devotion, a closeness or loyalty’. When it comes to marriage, the term dabaq refers to the type of ‘bond’ that should envelop the sexual union enjoyed within a marriage.

In Genesis 4:1 we also come across the Hebrew term yada (‘know’), which gives us even more insight into God’s desire for a loving, fulfilling sexual union within the sanctity of marriage: “And Adam knew Eve as his wife, and she became pregnant and bore Cain; and she said, I have gotten and gained a man with the help of the Lord” (AMPC).

Here Adam and Eve have sex for the first time. Not a mere physical act of sex (sakab) but a yada type of exchange. Yada means to experientially know someone and to be known in return, which when used in the context of sexual knowing, is the closest form of intimacy one can encounter with another.

It is only within the trustworthy boundaries of marriage that God has ordained such profound intimacy to occur, because it is only within this context that two people can truly be transparent, can truly trust one another and can therefore truly enjoy unbridled freedom of sexual expression and oneness; a oneness built upon unconditional love and vulnerability.

You see, God is not into impersonal, temporary, transferable bumping and grinding. For God, sexual intimacy is part of a wider communication process within the marriage union that grows and deepens over time: strengthening and enhancing the marital relationship.

Yet surprisingly, strengthening the marriage union, although super important, is not the only reason that God created the gift of sex. There are several other incredible reasons God has created sex and the more we explore God’s purpose for it, the more we will want to celebrate, nurture, preserve and cherish it. 

Covenant intimacy

This is possibly the most important reason for God to create sex and for Him to design it within the boundaries of marriage. You see, yada can only happen when a man and woman are committed to one another in a lifelong matrimonial relationship.

It is only within this sacred, exclusive, union that true ‘knowing’ can occur because the very root of this word denotes an unveiling of treasure, a revealing that happens in the depths of sacrificial, shared intimacy in a faithful, covenant relationship with one another; a covenant relationship being a binding agreement between two or more people.

A blood covenant is the strongest type of covenant there is. Only death can break a blood covenant. This is why in marriage a wedding ring is worn because it signifies an endless, eternal bond. In Genesis 4:1 God established a blood covenant between Adam and Eve, when they consecrated their marriage union by having sexual intercourse together for the first time. Hence why a woman’s hymen breaks the first time she has sexual intercourse, because the blood shed when the hymen breaks cuts a blood covenant, sealing the two virgins together for life, as man and wife.

Intimacy in marriage is so powerful, because it is symbolic of our covenant relationship with Christ

Subsequently, each time a married couple has sex they are in fact re-establishing their marriage covenant. As the people of God, we are also in a covenant with Him. It is the reason why intimacy in marriage is so powerful, because it is symbolic of our covenant relationship with Christ. Those that believe that Jesus shed His blood unto death, to pay the penalty for sin, and was raised again, thus redeeming us eternally have entered an eternal blood covenant with him.

This article is based on an extract from Bobbi’s book Sacred Sexuality.

The Sacred Sexuality Conference runs from 30 March to 1 April 2023. Visit livinginlight.co.uk/sexposed to book tickets now. Bobbi’s book can be bought at livinginlight.co.uk/shop

Watch the powerful promotional video for the Sacred Sexuality conference here.