Why Hayden Panettiere had her daughter baptised in Ukraine – and what she said about the ‘incredible’ Christian moment

On Monday morning, we woke up to the sad news that 36-year-old American actress Hayden Panettiere had passed away. Her death remains under investigation and an official cause has not yet been given. While Panettiere was known by millions on screen for her acting roles from a young age, our prayers must immediately prioritise her family:

‘It is with profound sadness that we share the tragic passing of our beloved Hayden. She was an incredible light and a force of nature who brought immeasurable love and joy to all who knew her — and to the millions who watched her onscreen.’ (Skip Panettiere, Hayden’s father, ABC News.)

Hayden grew up behind the camera. She even attended auditions as a baby with her mother. By the age of four, Hayden was appearing in the US TV show One Life to Live. She later shot to fame with her roles in the series Heroes as Claire Bennet and in Nashville as Juliette Barnes. She also appeared in Remember the Titans, Raising Helen, Ice Princess and Scream 4.

I used to watch Heroes when I was at university, and Claire’s character was memorable as a popular high-school cheerleader in Texas who develops rapid cellular regeneration, making her indestructible. She was a resilient and brave heroine who did what it took to save others from danger, even as she faced her own fears.

READ MORE: The deep darkness of post-natal depression

In real life, Hayden bravely faced many of her own demons, and earlier this year she released a memoir, This Is Me: A Reckoning.

In real life, Hayden bravely faced many of her own demons, and earlier this year she released a memoir, This Is Me: A Reckoning. Within its pages, she pulls back the curtain on her struggles with postpartum depression after the birth of her daughter, as well as sharing candidly about alcoholism and recovery, loss and abuse. She also admitted: ‘From a very young age, I lost the chance to have a normal childhood, friends, relationships, and my privacy.’

Panettiere met Ukrainian boxing champion Wladimir Klitschko when she was just 19; he was 13 years older. They had a daughter, Kaya Evdokia, five years later. Hayden suffered from postpartum depression after Kaya’s birth.

‘I never felt any hostility or negativity toward my child, thankfully, but I wasn’t connecting with her the way that I knew I should be, and I was full of stress and anxiety all the time.’ She began drinking to cope: ‘What I was doing to suppress those emotions was not normal, and it was not healthy.’

Despite Hayden receiving treatment, when Kaya was three, Klitschko wanted primary custody because of Hayden’s drinking. Hayden eventually consented, but wrote: ‘Not being under the same roof with her every day has been the most gut-wrenching experience of my life, and it’s hard to describe the layers of emotion, including sadness, resentment, and anger, I felt because of it. I grieve that I’m not the mother I thought I’d be, and definitely not the mother I want to be. Trust me, no one should ever have to raise a child on FaceTime.’

READ MORE: The Holy Spirit tells me what to wear

It’s heartbreaking that Hayden was denied the chance to enjoy the wonderful, God-given gift of motherhood.

It’s heartbreaking that Hayden was denied the chance to enjoy the wonderful, God-given gift of motherhood. We don’t know if Hayden ever knew her heavenly Father. She was raised Catholic but didn’t ever comment on whether her religious upbringing led to any kind of real faith that meant anything to her. She and Klitschko did have Kaya baptised in a church in Ukraine, and Hayden described it as an ‘incredible’ moment:

‘We did her baptism [in Ukraine], and that was one of the most incredible parts of the trip.’

‘This kid loves water and of course she’s never cried anytime we’ve put her in the shower or the bath or the ocean, she loves swimming,’ Panettiere continued. ‘The one time we need her to not cry is the priest dipping her into the holy water and this kid is just wailing. All the pictures — beautiful pictures, everyone is all dolled up and our heads are covered and she’s like [screaming].’

The couple also secretly wed during the same trip.

READ MORE: As a missionary to Ukraine, the Ukrainian people are teaching me about resilience

It’s really wonderful that Hayden saw significance in her daughter’s baptism. It was a meaningful ritual dedicating Kaya to God, and I pray that as she grows up, His hand will be on her life and that He will lead her into a personal, living relationship with Him. I also pray that if Kaya ever becomes a mum, her story will be different from Hayden’s.

Despite a successful career, the fame, red carpets and accolades, fame came at the ultimate cost for Hayden, and God’s heart breaks for her and those she left behind far too soon. Let’s lift up her parents in our prayers this week.

Her mother, Lesley Vogel, had a complex relationship with Hayden, and they had been estranged for the last few years. Lesley and Skip, who divorced in 2012, also lost their son, Hayden’s only brother, who died two years ago from an enlarged heart. I cannot imagine the pain of losing both your children so young.

Finally, let’s remember that postpartum depression is a medical condition that affects more than one in 10 women in the UK. If you are suffering, t’s not your fault, and it doesn’t mean you’re failing as a mother. If you or someone you know is struggling, encourage them to reach out to their health visitor or GP and get treatment.