Midwife Hannah Ketcher asks what it really means to trust God when making decisions about pregnancy and birth – and whether questioning medical advice can be an act of faith. She explores how prayer, wisdom and professional expertise can work together, while reminding us that surrendering to God doesn’t mean surrendering our voice.
I was nine days past my due date with my first baby when I sat opposite a consultant discussing what happened next. NICE guidance around induction had recently changed, and I had decided I didn’t want to be induced at 41 weeks. As a midwife, I knew the guidance and what the evidence did and didn’t say. I was comfortable with my decision.
The consultant offered me a scan earlier than I had planned. And I agreed. I went home, talked to my husband and thought, “Why did I agree to that? That isn’t what I wanted.”
I vividly remember sitting on our bedroom floor later, my husband perched on the end of the bed, as I called my midwife to say I had changed my mind. I was happy to explain my reasoning, but I hadn’t anticipated having to defend it.
As she questioned my decision, I became increasingly flustered. By the end of the conversation, I was incredibly thankful my husband had heard it too, because I was beginning to wonder whether I was the one not making sense.
And I am a midwife. I advocate for my clients all the time without second-guessing myself. Yet when it was me, it was so much harder.
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We are taught, rightly, to respect those in leadership and authority.
I think there are layers to this for Christian women. We are taught, rightly, to respect those in leadership and authority. 1 Peter 2:17 tells us to “show proper respect to everyone” and to “honour the emperor”. But respecting someone’s authority or expertise doesn’t mean believing everything they say will always be right. After all, they’re human too.
There is a cultural element as well. In Britain, we are incredibly fortunate to have the NHS. We have traditionally placed huge trust in medical professionals and often unquestioningly accepted their recommendations. That is slowly changing, but there is still a hangover from it. Gratitude for healthcare doesn’t require us to hand over every decision about our bodies or our babies.
So where does God fit into this? For me, He has to be part of the whole conversation. Proverbs repeatedly tells us to seek wisdom, and James tells us that if we lack wisdom, we should ask God for it. Why would that stop when we walk into a consultant’s room?
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Sometimes the wisest decision will be to accept exactly what is being recommended.
That doesn’t mean disregarding medical expertise because we have prayed, nor does accepting medical intervention demonstrate a lack of faith. Sometimes the wisest decision will be to accept exactly what is being recommended. Sometimes we may need to ask more questions, request more time or make a different decision. Most maternity decisions don’t need to be made instantly. We can ask about the benefits, risks and alternatives. We can go away and pray. We can involve people we trust and ask them to pray with us. And sometimes, amid all of that, there is a peace that doesn’t necessarily make logical sense. Like in Philippians, where Paul describes “the peace of God, which transcends all understanding”.
I eventually went into labour naturally at exactly 42 weeks and chose to give birth at home. I had prayed extensively about that decision and asked others to pray too. I was fortunate to have continuity of care, with the same midwife throughout my pregnancy and at my birth. She knew the journey I had taken to get there. Yet during labour, she reminded me that I was giving birth “outside guidance”. I remember looking at my husband after she left the room and thinking, “You have got to be kidding me.” Why now?
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Labour takes so much of you physically, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually. I didn’t have the capacity to defend a decision I had already carefully made. So I turned back to what had grounded me throughout pregnancy. Christian hypnobirthing tracks played in the background, followed by worship music, helping me refocus on God and the job my body was doing.
Trusting God didn’t mean everyone around me agreed with my decision. But surrender works both ways. We can become so attached to the birth we have imagined or prayed for that we struggle when the path changes. There isn’t one “Christian” way to give birth. Sometimes surrender may mean having the courage to question what is being recommended. Sometimes it may mean accepting help or intervention we desperately hoped we wouldn’t need.
For me, trusting God in maternity care means inviting Him into the decisions, seeking wisdom, listening to those with expertise, asking questions when I need to, and ultimately being willing to surrender the journey to Him
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