In the light of the Bangor Cathedral scandal, how can women stay safe in spiritual spaces?

In recent months, more painful revelations have shaken the foundations of UK Christian ministry, raising a central concern for women in faith: Is my spiritual space truly safe? Something that has highlighted this is the recent retirement of Andy John, the Archbishop of Wales amid scandals of financial mismanagement and toxic culture at Bangor Cathedral.

On 27 June 2025, Archbishop Andy John, who was also Bishop of Bangor, announced his immediate retirement as Archbishop (effective immediately) and intention to retire as Bishop of Bangor by 31 August 2025.

His decision followed mounting pressure after an independent review by ThirtyOne:Eight uncovered a toxic culture at the cathedral.

His decision followed mounting pressure after an independent review by Thirtyone:eight uncovered a toxic culture at the cathedral. According to journalist, Tim Wyatt, the reports of the situation at Bangor “pretty much confirmed there was a lot of drinking, sleeping around, backbiting, bullying – basically a whole culture that was completely out of kilter with what a place of Christian worship is supposed to be about”.

READ MORE: There would be fewer church scandals if there were more female pastors…or would there?

Misconduct is not just in churches, but other spiritual spaces. As we know, investigations into leaders like Soul Survivor’s Mike Pilavachi, whose misuse of power over vulnerable young people has been independently substantiated, underscore that spiritual abuse isn’t theoretical. It’s a real, distortion of leadership under the guise of God’s authority.

READ MORE: I was hurt in the very place that was meant to be a sanctuary

So what can we do? Avoid church altogether? Seems tempting sometimes, but I don’t believe that’s the answer. Here are some red flags you can look out for:

1. Unquestioned authority: Leaders who claim direct, personal revelations from God without accountability or transparency, breed spiritual dependency and often, manipulation.

2. Coercion and shame: If repentance or confession is done publicly or leads to humiliation, consider whether it’s serving God or a sign of control.

3. Lack of oversight: Promotions that happen quickly, with no safeguarding checks, like recent scandals in the Church hierarchy, are often signs that abuse can hide. At Bangor Cathedral, Rhys Evans – who was seen as a protégé of Bishop John – was made acting dean only a few years after being ordained as a priest. Tim Wyatt noted that, to be elevated so quickly to a high-profile job was an “astounding over-promotion”.

4. Closed culture: Environments where questions are discouraged and complaints are dismissed, often protect perpetrators and silence victims.

5. Spiritual coercion as behaviour control: When biblical references are weaponised to pressure into submission or silence, it is abuse, even if subtle.

READ MORE: The Church does not need a female archbishop

Here is my advice on how to protect yourself:

1. Read your Bible. Know what it says, and get to know Jesus from the Gospels.

2. Learn your rights: Understand church safeguarding policies; ask about their abuse-reporting process and who oversees it.

3. Seek accountability: A healthy spiritual environment always includes checks and balances, councils, teams, or external advisors.

4. Find trusted support: Whether it’s a Christian counsellor, mentor, or peer group (like Survivors’ Voices’ Faith & Abuse network) survivorsvoices.org, you deserve safe spaces where your voice matters.

5. Speak up early: Timely, truthful conversation can prevent harm. If leadership resists or pressurises, that’s often a red flag.

6. Embrace discernment in prayer: Ask God for wisdom. He honours honest prayer and the courage to set healthy boundaries.

7. Stay nimble: No church is perfect, every community stumbles. But a healthy church listens, confesses wrong, and commits to change.

Living in the reality of “no perfect church” means we must balance grace with wisdom. The Bible calls us to honour spiritual leaders (Hebrews 13:17) while also urging us to evaluate teachings and test them against Scripture (1 John 4:1). This isn’t contradiction, it’s biblical leadership and community care.

We are not betraying our churches by asking tough questions. In fact, the opposite is true. When we shine the light of Christ’s truth and compassion into hidden corners, we activate the Gospel’s redemptive power. We protect the vulnerable, call leaders to godly accountability, and embody the love of a Saviour who sees injustice and calls us to courageous faith.