For many Christian women, swearing is a taboo, but doesn’t it sometimes just feel good?!

Recently, I was reversing our (old) car and smacked straight into a metal bollard. I swore…loudly! My kids were in the back. There was no music to drown it out. Just my nasty, unfiltered response that was not exactly Sunday school approved. And do you know what? The kids didn’t even flinch. Apparently, Mummy cursing in the car is a common occurrence.

Some seasons of life are so terrible that a “gosh darn it” or a “whoopsie daisy” just doesn’t cut it.

Some seasons of life are so terrible that a “gosh darn it” or a “whoopsie daisy” just doesn’t cut it. Maybe you lose a job, a baby, or a marriage. Maybe you receive an unexpected car bill or a life-changing diagnosis. How do you respond in those moments?

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You’re hurting, scared, panicked and still meeting the needs of loved ones. All it takes is to spill dinner down your top and you erupt into a sweary-rage monster, exploding filthy four-letter phrases.

Swearing feels good.

And it is a taboo rarely spoken about by Christian women. We’re the ones meant speak with love and gentleness. Only saying things that are “lovely”, “uplifting,” and “helpful.” But let’s be honest—most of us swear (or have sworn). Maybe not in home group or in front of the pastor. But we splutter like a sailor from time to time. We just don’t admit it.

If we’re honest, we know it’s not ideal.

If we’re honest, we know it’s not ideal. Satisfying as it may be, even satisfying things need to be submitted. The wonderful promise as disciples of Jesus is that everything can be redeemed —our minds, our bodies, our choices, our habits. Even our mouths. When it comes to our language, we are invited to bring all of it under his authority.

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Ephesians 4:29 says, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up.” It’s not about sounding holy. It’s about being aware of the impact our words have—on others, and on ourselves. Luke 6:45 says: “Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks.” I would argue that’s the real issue. Not just what we’re saying—but why.

Is my swearing actually a cry for help? A reaction to pain I haven’t processed? A sign I’m operating at full capacity and pretending I’m not? An unhinged complaint about life? Swearing isn’t just about bad words—it’s about broken hearts.

READ MORE: On being a good role model for your (sometimes challenging) teenagers

The book of James calls the tongue a “restless evil” and a spark that can set a whole forest ablaze. But, it can be tamed. This might seem impossible – and it would be by sheer willpower—but we’re called instead to gain back control through submission. In us, the Holy Spirit can produce the fruit of self-control even when we’d rather throw a verbal punch at the nearest family member.

So, are Christian women allowed to swear? We’re able to. But we’re called to more. To be set apart from the world – and that includes our language. It’s not about performing for others—it’s about being formed by God.